If the King were President...

I've done some thinking lately. I do lots of thinking lots. If Elvis were our president. It might be interesting. Peanut butter and banana sandwiches might be in again, and there might be a lot of interesting decorations in the WH. Have you ever been to Graceland? It's interesting the way money can change people. Sometimes it can change people for the worse, sometimes for the better, and in the case of Elvis, sometimes for the really strange. It seems that fame can do the same. Mr. Obama now, as POTUS, has both fame and money. He can now have beer summits and send his wife to lobby for his "hometown's" Olympic bid. His wife jaunts off all over the world while more Americans are unemployed than anytime in my lifetime. There seems to be no end in sight to the economic downturn, but for the Obamas, money is no object, to them at least. As taxpayers, we should demand the right to audit the expenditures of the first family as related to taxpayer dollars. I don't like the vagueness of her trip's expenses. I don't see how her vacation with 800 of her "closest" friends can be taxpayer responsibilities. I understand she's not the elected official, but let's be realistic here. What woman would leave her husband's side for his 50th birthday and travel across the world while the weight of the USA's problems are on his shoulders? Maybe they are fighting. Maybe he had an affair. Maybe she's having an affair in Spain. I don't really care why they aren't together, I'm just thinking it doesn't seem right. In the immortal words of Goofy, "Somethings wrong here". I think as many of us as possible should take a tour of the White House and see what interesting decorations are there. If there is a hairy couch and a waterfall in the first families living room, be scared, very, very scared.

J-







Graceland: The Living Legacy of Elvis Presley

National Night out of the box....

I hate conventional wisdom. I hate conventional thought. Conventional thought and wisdom has taken our country a long, long way down the wrong road. I hate having to vote for the lesser of two evils (or throwing my vote away, which I generally do). I hate the fact that our country has boundaries that change every time the wind blows (for immigration) and the fact that our country is still run by lunatics who can't define a shape other than a box. Let's try thinking inside the rhombus (the politicians are typing it in Word for synonyms right now) at least Washington. I hate the fact that service generally sucks these days. I really hate the fact that we're constantly told that we live in a primarily service economy these days. And what really blows is the fact that we live in a primarily service economy AND the service sucks. No wonder the economy tanked. Why can't people in service jobs: understand their job, do their job, at least pretend to be happy while doing their job, be able to add two whole numbers, and know what Ovaltine is? I don't think it's too much to ask to have a manager at a grocery store know what Ovaltine is, do you? I spent my national night out at the grocery store, and contrary to what you might be thinking, not pining for a banana express, but rather waiting for a manager to tell me where they had the Ovaltine hidden, and where the 1.99 Boneless skinless chicken was. They called for the butcher 5 times. I never heard a reply. I went and allowed my eggo waffles to defrost and my milk to sour while I served myself. If we're going to have a "primarily" service economy, we're doomed. Do you job. Do it well. Do it with a smile on your face. Or don't do it for me. Thank God for the people who work at convenience stores. For some reason (I've done this work, it's exhausting) they seem to be generally cheerful people. Well, most of them. Remember, if the service sucks and it wasn't "5 dollar" on a corner in Vietnam, it is unacceptable.

J-

PS- My wife is angry with me for this post. She says "service" people get a bad rap. Oops, sorry service people, I'm only giving you a bad rap IF: you can't add two whole numbers, you don't know what Ovaltine is, or give me, as the customer, your attitude when you're having a bad day.

PPS- My wife is still irritated with this post, apparently she's afraid I've been to Vietnam.

PPPS- She finally laughed.

How to get rich (and piss me off) in a litigious society.

I'm sure there's something that someone hasn't thought of yet. Hot coffee, nope, been done. Slippery floor, nope, been done. "Accidental" accident (insurance fraud), nope, been done. These things have been tried, and ridiculously, succeeded. What can I do to make millions of dollars these days? I know, medical malpractice. It's been done before you say. I know I say. But, there is nothing in place to stop it from happening again. Why? We have signs warning us of slippery floors, signs warning us that the hot coffee is, get this, HOT. All of these signs it seems these days come in two flavors, English and Spanish. Sometimes we get German and French. So, after years of driving malpractice insurance through the roof because of malpractice, we still have no control over frivolous lawsuits in the medical and drug fields. Anyone remember Vioxx? I took it. I loved it. I can't understand why I can't have pain relief because someone with a heart condition that I don't have died from Vioxx. So, instead, I live with pain that isn't necessary. Thanks everyone in this wonderful litigious society. So, if you're looking to get rich the easy way, just have as many surgeries as you possibly can in the shortest amount of time. Better yet, schedule eight surgeries at the same time, chances are one of the surgeons will forget something somewhere and you'll wake up setting off metal detectors. Even better, maybe they'll leave something soft inside you (less irritating) and you can get an unprecedented sum of moolah. If anyone succeeds in doing this, please let me know how to get the appointments for the doctors\surgeons, because I can't even seem to get an appointment. Once, recently, I had a scheduled appointment for almost four months out, and halfway there the office called and canceled it. It seems the doctor they had slated to see me didn't even work there yet and wouldn't be there for yet another month. My entire family goes to the doctor and doesn't see a doctor. We see Physician's Assistants. I'm not saying that they aren't knowledgeable or able, I'm just saying that we pay the same amount as if we were seeing a doctor. And, we can't get appointments. With that said, how will Obamacare help with these situations? I can't imagine it will. I fully expect more delays in care, less options and longer lines. Ask anyone from a country where socialized utopian medicine already exists. At this point, I'd probably be happy paying my medical bills from my wallet rather than through an insurance. Insurance companies seem to mess things up. Wait, it's the litigious society that messes things up. Remember how doctors came to the house in old movies? Maybe if the doctors started doing that again, they could turn the tables on the litigious society by "accidentally" falling on the stairs and suing the patient. That would be righteous. Stay tuned for an important announcement from my sponsor Commiecare (the Health Care that does you dead).

J-

The Great Indoctrination Debate of 2010

I'm starting to wonder which is worse, a talking point or a talking head. At first it seems after the first 8 billion times I've heard a "point" that the "point" must be worse. Then I hear the hollow please everyone approach of nearly every politician out there. Then I think that the heads are worse. Then I hear Barack Obama. And, at that point I realize that what's worse than either is a talking head talking their talking points. I'm so sick of hearing how many jobs we would have been lost had the Obama Express done nothing. I'm so sick of hearing how greedy the wealthy are. I'm super sick of hearing how the haves must give to the have nots. Now on the cusp of expiring "Bush" tax cuts I think that talking points don't make sense. I think that the leftist indoctrination is flawed. Here is the way I see it: It takes grand amounts of liberal think tanks hours and days and months upon end to figure out the best way to do things. It takes country folk about 5 minutes. Why does it seem that students are tirelessly indoctrinated in college? My wife is a reformed socialist former socialism major. She can't understand why liberals can't use common sense. If you have no money, we think, go get a job. If you have no money and no skills, we think, go get some skills. If you have no money and no job and no skills and no desire to find skills, we think, then suffer. We (my wife and I) are honorable caring people. We don't WANT anyone to suffer, but won't prevent them if they so choose. We don't want anyone to be poor. We also don't want anyone to sponge the system. Common sense tells us that there are very few people who have no skills. There are however, some people it seems, with no skills and no desire to learn them, hence welfare. Now, the Bush cuts seem to be something that are worth hanging onto. It seems, with my limited economic training, that more money in the hands of people will do more to turn a recession around than anything else. Why then would the left want them to expire? Perhaps, I believe anyway, it's because the EVIL wealthy people get more from the tax cuts. Interesting isn't it? If a "wealthy" person gets a tenth more money to play with, and a middle class person gets a tenth more to play with, and the poor don't pay taxes in the first place, where's the problem? The problem I suppose is once again, the poor poor people who don't have money or skills. We live in the most fantastic place on earth. Find something to sell (that's legal). Sing on a street corner. For God's sake, panhandle, some of them people make a killing. Keep your hands off the money that I slave my rear off for. Those of you who know me understand that. Create something. Come up with an idea. Poor people can think can't they? There are more than 16 ways to skin a cat. Figure it out. Leave my bank account (under my mattress next to the 9mm in the near future I'm afraid) alone. If the president, the speaker of the house, and the majority leader of the senate fall off a cliff, who is saved? Nobody, the vice president takes over and talks the talking head's talking points.

J-

Heifers in heat will stand for anything...

Will you? Will the person you vote for? I was reading an article and trying to decipher the bottom line. Apparently, the bottom line is "Democrats will stand for anything to get them elected". Now that thing is gun rights and the NRA. The NRA is sending more money than ever to democrats, up over three times since W and Gore. That's interesting. I wonder how much research they(the NRA) have done on these fair weather friends. I have a friend that works there. I'll ask. Either way, doesn't it seem that when the times get tough the democrats change their minds to fit their desired base? Don't get me wrong, the Republicans will do the same thing. I just think that given the two choices, you should vote for neither. Libertarians stand for things that aren't popular. They have stood and probably always will stand for them. That's what I want. I want elected officials that will stand for the same things over and over and over. I don't want heifers representing me in Congress. I don't want a heifer in the White House. I especially don't want a heifer in the White House who talks. And, I really don't want a heifer in the White House who tells me that "it could be worse". If you want a heifer to represent you as an elected official, vote for 4250, at least she has nice legs.

J-

PS- Immediately after posting this particular post, I found a clip that says O will be a guest on "The View". No further comment necessary, at least not if you read the title. Maybe next he can appear on the "JOY"ful heifer show.

I'll try falling off again...

My wife asked me tonight if "they" thought we just fell off the turnip truck. I replied that, well, I do like turnips. She replied that she likes dirt, so maybe we did. To quote a quote of Napolitano.... "The numbers indeed show the border itself is more under control than it has ever been. Are we at zero? No. But have we deployed resources in …. smart and strategic way to get those numbers down? Absolutely." I must have fallen off the turnip truck. Smart and strategic to me isn't destroying our economy and making all people living in the USA, illegals and naturals alike, think Mexico, with it's gang drug violence, more appealing. If I were a Mexican illegal, and I couldn't find a job here, I'd go home. Home is at least where my family is. I'm going back on the turnip truck, maybe it will take me home (or better yet, Arizona =)

Is it any wonder the PI employs only people not able to climb on the turnip truck to fall off?

J-